General overview of advisory techniques and methods. Reflective Listening Technique: Summarizing Summarizing Examples
Summary- this is a reformulation technique, with the help of which they sum up not a single phrase, but a significant part of the story or the entire conversation as a whole. The main rule of the resume formulation is that it should be as simple and understandable as possible.
This technique is quite applicable in long conversations, where it helps to build conversation fragments into a semantic unity. It gives the listener confidence in accurately perceiving the speaker's message and at the same time helps the speaker to understand how well he was able to convey his thoughts.
Introductory phrases can be, for example, such:
“I have listened to you carefully. Let me check if I understood you correctly ... "(or:" Here's how I understood what happened to you ... ");
“If now to sum up what you said, then...”;
“From your story, I made the following conclusions ...”
Then you literally in two or three phrases retell to your partner what he told you for five to ten minutes. At the same time, you mark the key moments of its history, but choose the most concise form for this. If the client in our example immediately chose the second, more complete version of their problem, the summary of this story might look something like this: “Here is what I learned from your story. After yesterday's quarrel, your son did not sleep at home. You are worried about him, and you would like to establish a relationship with him. You would like to discuss with me how to improve the situation and strengthen your relationship in the future. Do I understand you correctly?"
Naturally, this is not the only option. The psychologist could focus on the quarrel and its consequences, on the client's feelings and their dynamics, on accusations and trust ... A very important feature of the resume is that summarizing with the help of linguistic means can change the emphasis in the client's story in such a way that in some way it will change original meaning. Moreover, the narrator, inattentively listening to the summary, may agree with it, inadvertently misleading the listener.
For example, a psychologist says: “You can say this: you have a conflict in the family, in which your son, wife, and relatives are involved. And you wouldn't want me to take their side..."
Strictly speaking, the client has nothing to object to here. Formally, the meaning of the story is conveyed correctly, and he will have to answer: "Yes." However, shifted semantic accents can lead the conversation away from a topic that is acutely relevant for the client (son) to another topic that is of interest to the psychologist.
To avoid negative impact summarizing the course of the consultation, it is important to remember the leading principle of its application: the topic of conversation is chosen by the client; the psychologist just follows him.
Summarizing can also be effective in cases where the client "walks in circles", returning to what has already been said. This behavior of the narrator is often associated with the fact that he fears that he will not be
understood or misunderstood. By formulating an accurate summary, the psychologist shows how he understood the already heard part of the client's story, and thereby "draws the line."
Apart from psychological counseling, summary is appropriate in situations that arise when discussing disagreements, resolving conflicts, handling claims, or in situations where any problems need to be resolved.
During such meetings and negotiations, a long discussion of an issue can become excessively complicated or even reach a dead end. Summarizing statements will help the debaters not to spend a lot of time reacting to the superficial, distracting remarks of the interlocutors, distracting from the discussion of the content of the problem itself.
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Surely everyone in childhood played a game - a damaged phone. At the input, the player receives one information, and at the output it is completely different. In negotiations with the client, there will always be moments of misunderstanding, inaccuracies, erroneous conclusions of the client, which can turn into problems for the company that sells the product and for the client who buys it. How not to miss important things in negotiations and how to fix the nuances you will learn from this article.
Successful negotiations are built on understanding
Understanding the buyer correctly is not only a guarantee successful sale, but also an effective and easy process of communication with the client. In this we will always come to the aid of a technique for clarifying and summarizing the information received from the client.
In colloquial speech, there are words that can be understood in two ways, for example: smaller, bigger, not bright, pale, not beautiful, rude, slow, long, fast, etc. The client must always be directed and rechecked. The article "" touched upon the topic of emotions that the client experiences at the stage of choosing a product. In this state, the buyer is not able to carefully control his statements. You, as the seller, must do this for him.
The refinement technique will help to accomplish this. Specify every detail, ask the client what he compares with, how he imagines the desired product. It is important not only to hear the information, but also to decode it into a format understandable to both. will help you with this.
For example:
Client: “This color seems very bright to me”
Seller: “Show me what color would suit you in terms of brightness?”
What seems “very bright” to the client may be considered completely neutral to you, so clarifying the details is very important in sales. Specify the nuances as accurately as possible: to a centimeter, to a gram, to a shade. That is why many manufacturers resort to coding colors, materials, equipment, products. The code has a precise definition, and if an order is received from the client, then it has a certain encoding that cannot be perceived otherwise - only as it was originally agreed. No matter how many chains of production and delivery an order goes through, there will be no effect of a damaged phone.
If your product is complex (equipment, cars, real estate, furniture, tour packages, services, etc.) and contains a lot of subtleties, adopt the habit of not only clarifying everything, but also writing it down for the client. No matter how trite it may seem, by fixing the clarifications on paper, you will save yourself and your deal from disruption and scandals. Especially when it comes to designs, shapes, appearance product - visual sketches, diagrams, photographs - will be very helpful. They will eliminate misunderstandings with the client that words generate.
Summary technique
You have probably heard more than once about summarizing in negotiations with a client. The summarization technique helps the salesperson to summarize all the information that he heard from the client during the consultation process into one conclusion. For example: “If I understand you correctly, do you need a blue color with red backlighting and metal inserts? Correctly?"
Many people use the summarization technique incorrectly in negotiations, rather at the wrong time, gathering together incomplete information in the middle of a consultation in order to quickly make an offer. But it is necessary to apply the technique of conclusions just at the end of the negotiations, when all doubts have been dispelled, objections have been overcome.
Fixing on paper, nuances, just helps in this. Firstly, you will not forget anything - everything is in front of your eyes. Secondly, you can almost instantly circle the main details with a pencil and quickly formulate a summary. Often, customers ask for a copy of such records, as it is also convenient for them to see the map of negotiations and restore in memory all the information that was discussed with the seller.
Conclusion
To avoid misunderstandings with the client, you should use the technique of clarification and summary in your work and you will notice how the number of errors in your work has decreased. professional activity, and sales went up along with the satisfaction of your customers.
Write your comments, we are looking forward to them!
1. Correlate the types of listening and their characteristics
1) Reflexive a) The speaker needs emotional release
2) Non-reflexive b) The speaker needs help in solving a problem
3) Empathic c) The speaker wants to be understood and appreciated
d) The speaker wants to be understood and somehow treated his message
2. Reflexive answers can be of the following types
a) clarification
b) clarification
c) paraphrasing
d) summary
e) awareness
3. Correlate the type of reflexive response and its features
1) clarification a) appeal to the speaker for clarification
2) paraphrasing b) reflecting the speaker's attitudes
3) reflection of feelings c) transmission of the speaker’s thoughts in his own words
d) summarizing the main thoughts of the speaker
4. When clarifying, the most preferred are
a) open questions
b) closed questions
c) combined questions
5. Paraphrasing is useful precisely when the interlocutor's speech seems to us ______________________.
6. When paraphrasing, the listener should be primarily interested in
a) speaker's attitudes
b) the meaning of the speaker's statement
c) the speaker's ideas
d) the speaker's feelings
7. Reflecting feelings helps
a) the speaker is aware of his emotional state
b) the speaker to realize that his experiences are understandable to the listener
c) the speaker to realize that the partner is experiencing his own feelings
d) the speaker to realize that the listener has his own problems
8. Summarization is mainly used
a) long conversations
b) short conversations
c) in insignificant conversations
d) in situations of disagreement
9. Summarizing statements are needed in order to
a) connect the fragments of the conversation into a semantic unity
b) give the listener confidence in the exact understanding of the speaker's thought
c) give the listener the opportunity to express himself
d) the listener could demonstrate his competence
e) the speaker understood how accurately he conveyed his idea
10. Reflective listening must be used in communication because
a) most words have multiple meanings
b) the interlocutor does not listen well
c) messages are often "encoded"
d) open self-expression causes difficulties
e) the interlocutor causes bewilderment and unpleasant feelings
11. During the Statement of the Problem phase, a _______________ hearing will apply.
12. Non-reflective listening is especially helpful when
a) the interlocutor has deep feelings
b) the partner says that requires a minimum response
c) the partner wants to be simply listened to
d) the partner wants to talk only himself
e) the interlocutor wants to discuss pressing issues
13. Determine the type of the minimum response-replica
1) Please continue, this is interesting a) coercive remarks
2) Well, it can't be that bad b) opening or neutral lines
3) Are you in trouble? c) prompting remarks
d) derogatory remarks
14. Empathic listening is characterized by the fact that
a) channels of influence are open
b) protections are disabled
c) barriers are getting stronger
d) protections are exposed
e) barriers are being weakened
15. The main purpose of empathic listening is to
a) it is important to understand the speaker's message as accurately as possible
b) it is important to catch the emotional coloring of the speaker's ideas
c) it is important to penetrate the system of the speaker's internal values
d) it is important to understand the feelings experienced by the speaker when expressing the message
e) it is important to understand the feelings experienced
16. Empathic listening is essential in situations of high __________ tension.
17. Match the type of bad listener and his characteristics
1) Pseudo-listener a) waits for the interlocutor to make a mistake
2) Listener-writer b) pretends to listen
3) Listener-bee c) listens to what is interesting to him
d) invents events or reactions himself, making up for the missed
18. Match the names of listener errors and their characteristics
1) degression a) unwillingness to apply mental
2) "vulnerabilities" b) critical words that unbalance a person
3) laziness of thinking c) listening time is used for side thoughts
d) focusing on "naked" facts
This article completes a mini-cycle dedicated to the development of competent (psychotherapeutic) listening skills in everyday communication. Other articles in this series: "Echo"-technique or say, I hear you", "Technique of reflective listening: paraphrasing".
What is a "recap" and what is it for?
Summary- this is when the listener, after the interlocutor has finished speaking, sums up what the interlocutor said. This summary is a very short story (brief summary), which includes the main
- thoughts,
- feelings,
spoken by the interlocutor.
Out of habit, it may seem that summarizing is either extremely complex or somehow unnatural. However, the real and wild “monsters of communication” found in wildlife master this technique, without even knowing what it is called by psychologists. Who are these communication monsters? Our beloved grandmothers, mothers, older sisters, brothers, good teachers. Those people who can be called "psychologists by vocation."
What is one of the secrets of the fact that we are always very pleased to communicate with them? That we strive to tell them our stories again and again?
They, without knowing it, every time when the supply of our speech runs out, use the "Summarizing" technique.
Why does summarizing have such a beneficial (psychotherapeutic) effect on our interlocutors? There are two considerations here.
First: "One head is good, but two is better."
When you retell someone else's story, replacing words with synonyms, and speech turns with other, also synonymous speech turns, a strange thing happens. New meanings are born! New frontiers are opening! Riddles are solved by themselves and dark corners are illuminated. A linearly told story gains volume and stereoscopicity. A chaotic monologue has logic and meaning. So why is one head good and two better? Because the second head can apply the summary technique and everything will fall into place with the first head.
Second: "Screen my life!" or "Roden sculpt you in height"!
Every person dreams of leaving their mark - this is inherent in us at an unconscious level. He longs to hear the echo of his voice when it has finished. (As an option: to see your face drawn by a living artist, and not to see your own face, but shot on a soulless "figure" ...)
Roughly speaking, every person dreams of creating a work of art based on the materials of his life (option: the current love drama): they shot a film, a TV series, wrote a novel in two volumes - like Gone with the Wind. Well, or at least they showed a story about him in the news. And for everyone to cry.
Or, at worst, they took an interview in the regional newspaper and attached at least a bad photo to the material ...
Everyone wants their "five minutes of fame." Although it is better, of course - eternity, like in Pushkin, but five minutes of fame are wanted and demanded by everyone.
So...
Therefore, when you summarize the story just told to you in your own (different!) words, you are already acting as a writer, journalist, interpreter.
See what a miracle happens. The two just talked. And now ... From " like nothing» already created « even something". PLOT. STORY. STORY. And the creator of all this is you.
Your summary is nothing but a DRAFT, SKETCH, PLENAIR SKETCH of the future novel "about the life of this man." A vague promise of a screen adaptation...
At least, your interlocutor, having heard your summary, hopes at least that you will not forget right a story told so that it sticks in your head. That you don't delete it as spam and retell it to someone else.
I will clarify: the interlocutor hopes - at an unconscious level. On a conscious level, on the contrary, he wants and insists that this story will not be made public by you. But who among us writes The Secret Diaries without ever contacting an Imaginary Reader?!
Using the summary technique, you can say as a summary:
- A pertinent anecdote summing up the situation
- parable,
- plot from a book or movie,
- a story from the life of your friends.
But when improvising in the "Summary" technique, remember that:
- Your resume should be short,
- always appropriate (especially if it is an anecdote or someone else's story!) If you doubt the complete relevance of the story you are telling, keep silent.
- Do not contain advice, notations and evaluations. Summary it is forbidden start with words like: “Since I always said that you are a fool and you don’t know how to choose men, it happened this time too. So you met another idiot who...
- the resume should contain turns of speech that are typical for the speech of your interlocutor. Especially try to include in your CV - unusual, rare words, jargon that your interlocutor likes to use. But do not abuse - so as not to look ridiculous.
Learn to communicate - by listening and saying the right things at the right time!
Elena Nazarenko